You can lead oil to water, but you can’t make them mix.

malaphornoun :

A mixed metaphor in which two similar figures of speech are merged, producing an unexpected combination.

Why are you here?

I think I'm lost.

All travelers get lost, and we are all travelers, my friend.

Maybe you wanted to find David Hatfield’s website, or his book of malaphors.

Or perhaps you fancy the oft hilarious subreddit of user-submitted malaphors.

Did you think this site was going to tell you something about the creator of the word “malaphor,” Mr. Lawrence Harrison?

Would you want to watch a fun video on all the crazy types of language misuse?

If you found your intended destination above, then we are glad we could help you reach it.

But if you like tabletop games, you’re in luck. We’re creating unexpected combinations to delight our community, and you’re invited to join in the fun.

I heard you do games.

Right you are. Click on one of our brands below, or scroll down for more about Malaphor LLC.

I want to send you spam.

Oh, we are glad that you thought of us, but really, that’s not necessary.

No no, seriously, we have plenty of spam and don’t need any more at the moment. When we finish with the spam we already have, you’ll be the first to know.

In fact, could we maybe send you something instead?

How about a newsletter from Join In Games™, showing all the cool stuff we’re up to?

For any spam you absolutely, positively must send, please print it out and mail to:

Karl Rove
Simon & Schuster
1230 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10020
USA

What is Malaphor LLC?

If you believe the tabletop gaming industry is bigger than ever, but so are its problems, we can relate.

We believe there is a better way. It’s a different way; a path we will have to cut ourselves. But we are here to make sure the path is cleared for those who want to follow in our footsteps.

Malaphor LLC is a pursuit to bring the value of these changes to the tabletop gaming industry as a whole. We hope you’ll join us on the journey to better.

We have to tear some things apart, and put the pieces back in very different places. We will discover new ways to think about the elements that make up our world. The unexpected combinations that will result are a feature, not a bug.

If you want to learn more about our vision, we would rather show than tell. Join In Games, TableTopolis, and Tabletop Bakeshop will do that. If you’re like us, we would love your support of one or all of them.